Day 162: An Embrace

Yesterday at work my boss used the phrase "in the closet." 

It brought to mind a thought I had weeks ago at the Pride parade. 

Many people in front of me right now - members of a very marginalized community - are happier than a large number of the majority.

I've heard in passing skeptical beliefs, that one's sexual orientation is a choice. 

I don't believe that any human would intentionally choose a lifestyle laden with ridicule, prejudice and discrimination. 

It's not a choice.

But it is an embrace - of who a person really is.

What we fail to fully learn in our society is that the ultimate freedom in life is being true to oneself.

 

This means seeking out and focusing on the things that make us happy and light us up. 

This means saying yes to the deepest desires of our hearts.

This also means taking a real look at our pains and struggles and how we are addressing or avoiding them.

This embrace of self-truth is not reserved for minorities or marginalized people. It is for everyone.

Because once we embrace ourselves, we can more fully embrace others.

Day 161: One Courageous Act

This morning a thought popped into my head.

The most entertaining, funny, or engaging people appear as such, not because of a certain trait or skill they have, but rather because they are fully embracing who they are.

They are simply being. To the fullest extent possible.

No restrictions. 

No comparisons. 

Just being who they are. 

Focusing on what they enjoy and what lights them up.

That's the secret.

It's acknowledging your path - the one that calls out to you every so often - and actually taking it..

I'm beginning to do this and, boy, is it scary. The feeling/sensation of allowing yourself to even imagine the dream inside of you being reality is - hard to describe.

I start to feel nervous - my hands (or perhaps my whole body) start to shake. I feel energized with a sense of delight (along with some disbelief). 

 

And then it hits me. 

This isn't actually nervousness or fright - it's excitement.

I think in the idea of 'excitement' there's always some component of nervousness. None of us can see the future or know for sure how things will turn out. But to a much larger degree 'excitement' is the desire and longing of the heart, creating a vibration that hums so rapidly it can be unstoppable - if we're courageous enough to lean into it.

Happiness is available to all of us. A life of delight is one we can all have.

It starts inside of us. 

It starts with the thing that keeps coming back to our thoughts; the thing that keeps filling us with a sense of joy.

It starts with one very courageous act.

Saying 'Yes' to ourselves.

Day 160: Unexpected

Some things in life seem like they are completely fixed.
Like they will never change. 

And then they do.

The trueness that's been trapped inside of them for so long finally finds its way to the surface.
And then breaks it.

This fresh fault like can evoke a number of different responses and views.

The only thing that can be safely agreed upon in such situations is that the change is unexpected.

Just like the change I observed in my Mass Cane plant.

Things change in unexpected ways. 

Regardless of the specifics, growth is always present.

Choose to nurture unexpected changes with curiosity, kindness, and openness - then delight in what they blossom into.

Day 159: Silenced

I made this collage a few years ago - 2019, I think. 

At the time I wasn't completely aware of the exact meaning behind it. But boy, does it seem obvious today!

When viewing it from the lens of our present, a time of societal regression of women's rights (amongst many other things), it's quite easy to see the message of silencing and oppression carried out by others.

. . .  but what about the silencing and oppression we carry out against ourselves?

How about the times we beat up on ourselves because we aren't:
  "good enough"
  "strong enough"
  "smart enough"
  "funny enough"
  "attractive enough"
  "important enough"
  [insert your personal "______ enough" here] ?

Or the times we hold our tongues for fear of:
 -what others will think
 -rejection
 -embarrassment
 -hurting others
 -disappointment
 -[insert your personal fear of ________ here] ?

Decisions based on the (assumed) actions of others will always silence the message, will always restrict.

Decisions based on what makes a person feel their best, energized, and alive will send messages far and wide.

Last time I checked, being mean and unappreciative of myself has never made me feel my best, energized, or alive. 

So, perhaps, the airlines got it right. 

Maybe in all of life it's important to put the oxygen mask on ourselves first before helping others. Because if we are short of breath and/or emotionally depleted, how can we sound our own call?

Day 158: Ghost Story

[Me and my sister arguing before bed on a recent night she stayed over]

Me: You have to close the [bedroom] door again. 

Her: Why? 

Me: Because I didn't hear it click!

Her: It's closed! I'm not going to open it and close it again.

Me: Do it!

Her: No! It's closed! 

Me: But I need to hear it click! . . . Because it creeps me out when the door opens on its own. And if I hear the click then I'll know it's closed - and if it opens then it's a ghost!

There it is. The real reason behind the insistent action request.

There is always some hidden belief (or fear) that fuels our most heinous demands (and even our 'rational' ones).

There is always more to what meets the eye - or ear.

There is always more to the story.

Knowing that this is the case - in probably 99% of seemingly irrational demands- gives us the incredible gift to be our own Paul Harvey. 

 

It gives us the opportunity to discover "the rest of the story."

How?

By uncovering the deeper meaning behind what we see or hear in order to get the full picture - all sides - not just the singular view we immediately see.

By asking questions.

By being curious.

Channel your inner investigative broadcaster - life's a lot more interesting that way.

Day 157: Never have i ever

Never have I ever been in the bathroom on my phone for so long that I crossed my legs, forgetting that I was sitting on the toilet . . .

Day 156: Observation love

I love observing.

I love observing so much.

 

When I start to take in everything around me, it's so fun. I get to look at - and really 'see' everything around me.

It's every time I go on a nature walk. Or am somewhere with a lot of people. It can happen at any time, really, but some situations are easier than others. 

Regardless of the setting, observing takes effort and it takes practice.

To observe for fun (and hopefully one day for 'sport') one has to release any judgements and resist the temptation to label things. And be open to following ideas that may seem silly.

 

For instance, take this image...

 

My first thought when seeing this man carrying his tiny bag was:

 

"I wonder what he's carrying in his toiletry bag? I bet he's going to the gym and he's just carrying around a stick of deodorant - and maybe something else."

 

And that thought exploration was enough to provide me a fit of giggles.

What observation delight have you experienced lately?