. . . You know, light water cooler talk.
From a VERY early age, our sense of self-esteem and self-worth has already started to take a beating.
Especially, if you're raised as a girl (or minority).
Especially, if you're raised as a girl (or minority).
"My niece is 7 and she already feels insecure about her body!
I was talking to my therapist about this," my coworker shared. "She said you have to un-learn the harmful things you were taught. It's all about a mindset change.
. . . I wish there was a school you could go to 'un-learn' things."
. . . I wish there was a school you could go to 'un-learn' things."
My immediate response:
"There is! Well, not school, per se. But, coaching does this! It helps you identify the thoughts and beliefs that aren't helpful to you and replace them with thoughts and beliefs that are."
"If these were skills taught in childhood can you imagine how different the world would be?!? If we learned how to think this way as kids in school?? But it's not taught."
"Yeah," my co-worker chimed in, "because you can make money off of people feeling bad."
The truth of her final statement is gross.
The reality that it's "normal" to dislike features of how you look or to have thoughts highlighting different angles of self-lack on a regular basis - is gross.
But really 'gross' is just a catch-all phrase for the sadness, heartbreak, anger, and disgust I simultaneously feel when I think about it.
Sadness for the pain that so many people experience.
Heartbreak for the collective inability of our society to see our own worth and value.
Anger that this is a real-life thing when it doesn't have to exist at all.
Disgust that the whole thing is fueled by money and power.
But also, I feel hope - and passion - in knowing that a self-injurious life and mindset does not have to be the norm; does not have to be the default.
It is possible - for every human on this planet - to experience a life fueled by personally supportive thoughts and beliefs.
It is possible - for every human on this planet - to have acceptance and love for who they are, just as they are.
It is possible - but it takes hard work.
Hard work that will never earn a certificate.
Hard work that will never earn a certificate.
Hard work that will at some point seem like it's taking 'too long.'
Hard work that will change your life and how you function in it.
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