I heard an old woman on the sidewalk saying, "I can't say anything right."
I heard this completely out of context as I passed by, eavesdropping, but she brought an important point to mind.
It's very hard to say anything "right" if you don't give yourself time to come to your full thought about things. And more importantly, give yourself time to figure out the words to convey your intended meaning.
I think instantly of an older person saying something (definitely not PC) that seems offensive.
I think also of the times in the recent past when I have heard a statement come out of my own mouth that does not sound good at all.
Like I didn't think before I spoke.
Like I could have really offended someone if what I said was, indeed, what I meant.
I can't speak for anyone else, but I know for sure when communicating with others my intention is never to offend, insult or diminish. And yet it still happens.
Why?
Honestly, there are a number of reasons, but the one I'm finding especially important right now is the need to take time to understand what you really mean.
This means allowing yourself to think out loud, to not be perfect, even to say things that might not be what you actually believe in an effort to uncover what you do.
This means embracing the experience of being human and the occasional challenges of processing new information, perspectives, and ways of being.
We don't know everything.
And we are not always right.
But maybe that's the point?
Rather than striving to be right, perhaps the real aim is striving to understand - and enjoying the inextricable growth that comes with it.
In the world we live, we will unintentionally offend others. There's just no way around it (because we have no control over other's thoughts or how they interpret the thoughts we share).
But we can greatly reduce these misunderstandings - and create greater peace in our own lives - when we take time to work out the real meaning we want to convey with our words and we give others the time to do the same.
