Have you heard the rumors?
I hope they're true.
I mean, FINALLY, someone else gets to make all of the difficult, incredibly important, and life changing decisions for me!
What a relief!
I'm talking about having a baby here, in case the title threw you off. And planning out my whole life path in advance - with titanium - so there's no possible way I can get thrown off course or, say, grow and learn about myself as a human and then change my opinion and preferences on things.
Nope, life is hard enough as it is. I'm totally game to shift that weight on to someone else.
I mean, if the government is willing to put in extra effort to decide if I have a baby or not, why can't it go a step further and make other areas of life easier?
Take eating for instance - do you know how hard it can be sometimes to decide what to make for dinner?!
It would be great if the government would just decide all of my meals for me. I can't be bothered with the energy it takes sometimes to pull a meal idea out of thin air - just tell me what I'm eating, Gov!
And while we're at it - it would be Fantastic if it could plan out all of my workouts, too. You know, picking all of the routines and letting me know what I'm doing each morning.
Because, as Tuesday's SCOTUS leak reminded us, the woman's role in the 21st century is still to make babies. And, pulling from what society has whispered in my ear my whole life, that has a greater chance of happening if we women stay fit and healthy so that males will find us attractive. Right? Did I get that right?
And our country cares SO MUCH about sacred human life, they will do whatever they can to make sure nothing tries to destroy it.
Which, when you think about it, is kind of comforting. Our country really cares about us!
- What's that? Oh, they only care about life when it's growing inside a woman's body, but after that everyone is on their own?
Huh . . .
Well, I guess it's just the first step towards revamping the way this great nation views the foster care system, early childhood education and childcare in general. Surely all of the money saved from abortion care and clinics will be more than enough to provide comprehensive care, training, therapy and monetary aid needed to ensure EVERY child, no matter what their living situation, is happy, healthy, and safe. I mean, this is America! We don't have orphanages . . .
And then there's sex education and contraceptives. We don't even need 'em! Let's just revisit the idea of chastity belts and the whole problem will be solved. I certainly don't need to decide when the time is right to have a baby. I'd rather have the government decide when my life is going to change.
Because knowledge is power, you know? I know that deciding what's right for my life and body is much too difficult of a decision for me to make on my own, so the government should have all the power.
See? Everybody wins!
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Obviously, these are satirical sentiments.
While I find this impending repeal of a woman's right to make decisions about her own body horrifying, I do have hope that many of the other taboo topics connected to reproductive rights (and health) will get the love they deserve.
To me, sexual education and convenient de-stigmatized access to free contraception seems like a great place to start.
In my mind, no woman WANTS to get an abortion.
No woman WANTS to make an incredibly taxing, mentally and emotionally traumatic decision that will stay with her for her entire life.
To disregard and devalue the living, breathing human that is already functioning and contributing in the world, because there is a living organism inside of her that may join the outside world 9 months later, is wrong.
If, morally, this country wants all fertilized eggs to meet the outside world, then they need to start nurturing and providing for the hosts who carry them.
This means 1000% religiously and politically neutral sexual education curriculum taught in ALL schools and at various age levels.
This means 1000% free and easy access to contraceptives and the accompanying education needed to ensure they are used correctly.
This means 1000% better mental and medical healthcare system, paid family leave, and free parenting and early childhood development classes.
What I see from recent news leaks is the opportunity to address the root cause of all of this. Abortion is a symptom of a bigger problem.
So that begs the question - what is it that we really want?