365 DW:V2 - Day 3: Pillow Talk

In keeping with the theme of approaching life with a variety of perspectives, I give you Pillow Talk.

There once was a girl named Debbie. She had been sleeping on very old, flat pillows for years. Over time, she started to notice that her sleep was getting very poor and would find herself tossing and turning all night. Some mornings she'd even wake with a sore neck! 

Eventually, a thought popped into her head about new pillows. "I wonder if new pillows would help?"

So after much too much deliberation, she purchased herself some new fluffy pillows.

"I can't wait to go to sleep tonight with my new pillows!!" she thought eagerly to herself.

 

 

Unfortunately, her slumber was not as restful as she had hoped it would be. With a resigned heart she had to admit to herself, the pillows were too full.

 

Debbie felt so disappointed - she was really excited at the prospect of nice new pillows that brought deep, restful sleep. And now that dream was ruined! What was she supposed to do now? Go dig the box they came in out of the recycling bin so she can put in a lot of effort she didn't want to spend to send them back??

 

Yep. She quickly confirmed that was the logical next step and scurried down 4 flights of stairs and outside into the cold to fetch her recently discarded box out of the recycling dumpster. 

After coming back inside, Debbie shared her misfortune with her sister, Janice. Janice quickly started sharing information about her own great pillow she has with a zipper, so you can adjust the filling to the exact amount that is right for you. 

'That's great for YOU, but how does this story help ME?!' Debbie thought to herself, deep in the throws of her pity party.

Then, all of a sudden, something clicked. 

 

"Hey! I could add a zipper and adjust the amount of filling in my new pillows! I know how to sew. I have a sewing machine. I have zippers. . . . and then I will always be able to have the perfect pillow, no matter how my needs change!"

 

Wow, now Debbie was singing a very different tune!

That evening after work Debbie began her pillow transformation. Opening up the seams at one end of each pillow, pulling out a guess amount of filling, and then stitching in a zipper to close everything back up. Debbie felt proud of herself. During the actual task there were some set backs and struggles, but looking at the finished zipper, she saw great work. 

 

 

But craftsmanship was not the goal of this endeavor - it was better sleep! Only time would tell if she had been successful in her efforts. Debbie was excited and nervous for the next morning . . .

 

Debbie awoke in almost the same position as she went to sleep the previous night. Her body didn't feel sore. And she slept soundly all night. IT WORKED!!!

 

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It's so easy to forget about the resources we have available to us when we are only paying attention to the problem. However, when we focus on what we WANT instead of what we don't want, it instantly becomes easier to figure out attainable steps to make it happen.

365 Days of Wonder: Vol 2 - Day 2

 Stray Bullet [coffee]

. . . a true story . . . 

It's morning. That mean's breakfast and coffee time.

"What are we eating today?" asked Stomach with a gurgle.

"Buttered English muffin!" cheered Brain and Tongue together.

Hands was already hard at work, toasting the muffins and pulling out the salted butter that Tongue loves so much.

- Pop! goes the toaster - The muffins are ready. 

"Hurry up, Hands, while it's hot so the butter gets all melty!" urged Tongue.

"Can't you see, I'm working on it?!" Hands shot back with irritation.

"WEEE can!" Eyes chimes out in unison.

Hands gets back to the task of buttering the muffin, then all of a sudden lets out a cry.

"Ahhhhhhh!"

"What happened?! Is everything ok??" everyone else asked as they gathered quickly around in concern.

"It -The . . .it was the . . . the butter!" Hands squeaks out. "It just shot off the knife like a stray bullet! ...Does anyone see it?"

heeheeheehee - a mysterious giggle seemed to be coming from the coffee cup.

Before it was too late, Eyes spots the butter before completely melting into the cup of coffee (clearly relishing the warmth like personal hot tub).

Everyone was silent, not sure how to proceed after what they just witnessed. And then Brain spoke. 

"Looks like we're having bullet coffee today." And with a universal shrug, that was that.

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 Believe it or not, this REALLY did happen to me the other morning! I was so surprised!!

At first I was upset ('I didn't intend to put butter in my coffee! what a terrible thing to happen, what a mess up!' [dramatized]). But then I shifted my perspective and thought about how this might actually be something that could benefit me or allow opportunities I wouldn't otherwise have had ('well, I hear bullet coffee is supposed to give you an extra boost and somehow is 'good' for you ... so maybe I really needed that this morning.')

This sort of shift in thinking, even when illustrated with a silly example, can be applied by anyone to any situation. It takes practice to be open to embracing things outside of what we have planned, but when we are able to do this we reduce stress, increase feelings of ease and have access to the world in new ways than we otherwise would. Plus, it makes for a WAY better story - adding an unexpected twist, rather than complaining about something going wrong.

Also, let the record show - I drank that stray bullet coffee and had a really great, energized day. I swear - I can't make this stuff up!

365 Days of Wonder: Vol 2 - Take Two

Pencil Snatcher

Several years ago I quit my job in order to save my sanity and to figure out what would really make me happy. Part of this half-brained plan involved regularly taking part in activities I used to enjoy, both near and far in my past. 

Writing was one of these enjoyments. 

Way back when, in elementary school, I used to love writing - stories, poems, you name it. But then somewhere along the way I stopped. I can't remember exactly when it was or why it happened, but something changed in me (or my circumstances) where writing was no longer a go-to past time for enjoyment. I can recall times where I'd have a funny idea pop into my head or think about writing out some thoughts I'd been having lately, but when it came to actually taking action I was met with a MAD case of inertia. I needed a bigger outside force to set my writing in motion.

So, all of that was just a long-winded way of stating that I will begin again what I started several years ago - a daily writing practice. 

365 days. 365 entries. 365 different thoughts and tidbits. And a lot of drawings, too, because I also used to love drawing (7 year old me, "I want to be an artist! And an author. and a scientist and a . . ."). 

I mean, check out these incredible Microsoft Paint skills - there's no denying this talent!

*     *     *     *     *    *    *    *    *

What did you love to do when you were young? 

How's that love lookin' now? 

Are you like me and it's been a while since you've done it? Why not blow off the dust and give it a whirl again? See what happens, see how it feels.

The Truth About Being Self-ish

What does it mean to be selfish? To some this might mean focusing your time and attention on yourself, choosing yourself first over others, or prioritizing the things you like to do even if others don't share the same interest.

It's a word that can at times carry with it guilt, judgement, and an all around bad rap. 

Here's the kicker - none of those things I just listed

- focusing your time and attention on yourself

- choosing yourself first 

- prioritizing the things you like

are selfish acts. 

They are not bad. 

They don't harm or take anything away from anyone else. 

In fact, I will argue, they are the key ingredients to living a happy, enjoyable life.

So why has self-focused behavior gotten such a bad reputation? I think it's time we take a minute to really look at what selfishness is and, dare I say it, redefine its meaning. 

Let's start with the word itself: Self-ish. It's made up of two parts. 

1. Self, meaning ‘you’ -  or the subject. 

2. ish, meaning 'kind of', 'around', 'more or less'. Ish gives a general sense of something without any specifics, certainty, or commitment. 

When you put those two pieces together by these definitions, what do you have? A pretty ambiguous, non-committal, and very unclear version of you. In my mind I see this as a hazy, somewhat blobby, human form. It's like you can almost make out defining features, but they are too blurry to really see.

So what does this mean? It means that the behaviors and actions we generally label as "selfish" are not because the subject in question is focusing on themselves, prioritizing their interests and likes, or choosing themselves first. It's because they aren't doing these things.

Think about it, if you are only yourself-ish, things start to get pretty muddled. When a person is only kind of themself, they aren't that fun to be around. Sure, they may go with the flow, but they are less able to meaningfully connect and engage with others.

If someone is 'more or less' themself they are more likely to experience miscommunications. This is because they aren't as assertive or direct in their preferences, which leaves things open to interpretation by others. Have you ever met someone you discovered was 'flakey'? This is a perfect example of self-ish at play.

So let's stop confusing the act of understanding and fostering the expression of one’s true self with being self-ish. A happier life, and happier world, come from living as our full selves. No ish about it.

In da club

I got all dressed up and went to da club tonight.  

I had all the dance room I needed. I always had something to drink. And I didn't have to worry about any creeps. It was great!!

 

The only downside was someone stunk up the bathroom while I was there... 

I can't wait to go back to my living room!

 

 

Do what interests you - at the moment

[Found this post covered in cobwebs in the far reaches of the Drafts folder, circa 2017 - and yet, it still holds true.] 

“Every next level of your life will demand a different you.”

I often look back on the path of my life thus far and am continuously amazed at how all of the parts have fit together so perfectly... and in the most unexpected ways. I can tell you right now that when I was deciding where I wanted to go to college and what I "wanted to do" I: 

1) didn't have a clear idea and 

2) NEVER would have guessed where my path would lead me.

To be completely honest, I kind of just made my decisions based off of my most current interests. For example, during middle school and increasingly during high school I was interested in designing and sewing my own clothes. I wasn't much holding fantasies about becoming a famous designer but it was something that I enjoyed. So when it came time for me to choose a career to shadow in high school and then eventually decide on a potential college major, it was easy for me to follow the suggested idea of fashion design. Why not? I liked doing it and I didn't really have any other solid alternative ideas.

I can still recall very clearly the confusion and what seemed like lack of validation many of the adults around me had for this decided ambition.

FLASHBACK:

Pretty much any Adult outside my family: What are you planning to study in college?
Friend 1: I'm planning to be a Dental Hygienist.
Adult: [oohs & ahhs] That's fantastic!
Friend 2: I'm going to go into Geophysics and Plate Tectonics.
Adult: Wow, so interesting!!
Me: I'm going to study Fashion Design
Adult: . . . oh, . .wow . . . how 'bout that . . .

Cool, I feel kind of bad now. Thanks for the boost! It's ok, not everyone can relate to the same experiences, ambitions or interests (though they should at least try . . . just saying). But no matter, that was my decision and I was sticking with it!

Looking back, 10 years later (holy cow!), I know that because I chose to explore a current interest (instead of basing my future on 'where I'd make the most money') I had the opportunity to:
- Study abroad in London
- Live in Africa
- Work with refugees from all over the world
- And most importantly, discover my love and passion for working with diverse cultures and helping others improve their lives.

Whoa, most of those do NOT sound like they'd connect with fashion design . . . Nope, they don't. And yet, they do. They did. As a sign I got from my sisters says:

Yes, I 100% agree. My path has NOT been linear . . . like, at all. But, I believe it HAS been just as it should be.

Here's why: I followed my interests. You can call this whatever you want:

following your heart

going with your gut

being true to yourself

answering your calling

Regardless of the words you use to describe your actions, you are making your decisions based on whatever is pulling you. 

This is hard to do. 

Especially if you don't have a support group to encourage whatever journey you embark on. I have been incredibly fortunate and blessed to have such a support group, which, unfortunately, I have learned is not as common as one would think. But, if you're willing to take some [probably] scary jumps and live YOUR life and not a life others expect of you, I am almost certain you will create experiences for yourself that you never would have dreamed of. Experiences that will stretch and expand your mind, skills, and thinking like you wouldn't believe. Experiences that will undoubtedly change your life. 

What are you interested in right now?
Why not explore it and see what happens . . .?

Sarah's World Press - Breaking News!

SARAH'S WORLD PRESS

Progressive Amendment to Restrictive Abortion Ban

ATLANTA (SP) — In an unprecedented amendment to the 'Heartbeat' Abortion Ban signed into Georgia law on Tuesday, lawmakers have shocked the nation with the quickest update to any bill in the state's history. What was initially viewed with outrage by pro-choice supporters has now fallen into a gray area with the added provisions:

• Free healthcare for mothers and their children, from conception to age 5, including:
• Prenatal medical appointments
• Postpartum checkups (as needed for a minimum of 1 year)
• Prenatal mental health visits and postpartum therapy sessions (as needed for up to 3 years)
• Free transportation to and from all healthcare appointments
• Monthly stipend for baby supplies for the first 24 months after birth (for items such as diapers, milk replacement formula, bottles & accessories, breast pumping supplies, baby food)
• Monthly stipend equal to previous living wage prior to pregnancy for first 6 months, postpartum
• Additional funds will be given in cases of job discrimination during pregnancy or health issues preventing pregnant mother from working
• Free childcare for children up to age 5

With such changes, it appears Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp is even more committed to living out his sentiment “to ensure that all Georgians have the opportunity to live, grow, learn and prosper in our great state.”

The future outcome of such a law is unclear, but these new changes have many thinking this is a step in the right direction.

This is a developing story.