Day 184: Generosity

Generosity to others expands in direct proportion with the generosity we give outselves.

When we restict and set limitations to our wants, pleasures and joys, the generosity towards others, too, becomes restricted.

When we allow ourselves simple joys, indulgences, and delights, the desire to give, share, and be generous with others amplifies.

Experiment for yourself.

Think about a period of time you restricted giving to yourself. What did your generosity towards other look like and feel like at that time?

Conversely, think about a period of time where you were generous and giving towards yourself. What did your generosity towards other look like and feel like at that time?

It's possible this phenomenon is unique to me. But I don't think that is the case. No matter how true it may seem, no one person is so original, unique, or different that they are the sole experiencer of any particular occurance.

We are never alone - at least in our experiences. And when we are generous with ourselves we become even more connected with others.

Day 183: Something you need to know

 

 

"If you received this card from me, that means
I see something that you need to know."

 

I found this on the ground near the back entrance of my apartment building. 
. . . does that mean it's from the Universe?

 

I don't know what it means, but I'm sure there's some significance to it. 

 

We can all use a reminder from time to time to break out of our usual ways of thinking in order to take in something new. 

I wonder what I'm missing right now . . . ?

Day 182: Phases of priority

I wonder if we have a hard time remembering what we really enjoyed as children (i.e. the basis of what we are most passionate about), once we reach adulthood because we've gone so long with it not being a priority.

When we are young, we are all about the things we like. Then as we grow up, other things come onto our radar and the initial interests are given less and less attention. 

They are no longer priorities in this phase of life.

It makes sense. 

As a child you are enjoying life. 

As a teen and young adult (while still enjoying) the focus shifts to experiencing and trying to understand life. 

Then once you settle into relatively established adult life -and you've more or less got the hang of things - you have more time again to direct towards the things you love. You know, fulfillment and purpose sort of stuff.

But there's a problem -

You aren't really certain of what you love anymore. 

It's been so long since you've experienced that child-like joy - and the activities that brought it - that they are kind of hard to identify.

So you do what you're "supposed to do as an adult."

Whatever the heck that means...

Boring things? 

Things that don't seem entirely engaging or appealing to you?

And no matter what you do, you still can't seem to find that thing you're looking for. 

In all of that searching and forcing you overlook the option of just being.

Just Being. 

 

Being you. 

 

Tapping back into the feeling of childhood, when the things you did were because they interested you. Because they made you feel good.

With no set agenda or expected outcome, the goal really can be simply to enjoy.

Let's start there. Let's start with things we enjoy, even for a brief moment.

You might be surprised what you find.

Day 181: We are all rats

I saw a rat run across the sidewalk in front of me and hide underneath a parked car. 

I would be seeking refuge, too, if I were a rat. 

Rats are given a bad reputation. The collective thought being, "oh gross, a rat!" when seeing one.

Their reputation is 'being disgusting,' after all.

Have you ever had an experience where you were labeled something that had nothing to do with who you are or your characteristics? 

We are all rats. 

There's nothing inherently wrong with us. 

We are not gross. 

But we are often given labels by others. 

Just like rats.

And maybe we do eat garbage. 

And we may also spread disease. 

But this isn't our fault. 

The garbage and the disease comes from the environment in which we live.

I don't know the last time you took a look at the western social climate we live in, but it's not great.

We all ARE human. We are all living beings.

And we all have a place and a purpose.

We don't have to accept the labels put upon us.

We don't have to accept the same fate as rats.

Day 180: Delight

Yesterday afternoon my attention was caught by the sound of child giggles drifting through my open window.

Naturally, I went to investigate. 

I saw a little girl playing fetch with a neighbor dog in the back alley while her mom talked with the dog's owner.

Every time she threw the ball peals of laughter would erupt. Her delight in watching the outcome of her effortful throw followed by the dog taking flight was palpable. 

Whoa, when did I start grinning so widely? 

I felt like I could stand there for days, just watching this child play. 

Then I found myself thinking, "I bet this is one of the first times she's done this. I wonder if playing fetch with a dog is a new experience for her?"

The little girl eventually started chasing the ball herself, overcome with excitement in everything that was happening.

As a got my fill of observational-back-alley-window-creeping, I thought about how I personally recognize delight and experience it in my own life. This brief deconstruction revealed a number of details and [true to me] truths I hadn't before realized, such as:

I love the feeling of delight so much because it feels like you're experiencing something for the first time.

It doesn't matter if it's brand new or old hat - when you are delighted by something, there is such a sense of surprised joy. It's a single moment (or experience) that fills you with joy so instantly and unexpectedly, it surprises you.

And it's a wonderful surprise - probably the best feeling you could ever imagine - in a quick flash.

Much like a verbal exclamation of 'ouch!' (or other expletive) is the instant pain reaction to touching a hot pan, giggles are the joy reaction to delight.

Delight comes from the lack of expectations; being open to whatever the experience brings.
And it's when the unexpected occurs, that the magic happens.

Day 179: Glamour Shots

Tell your friends

Day 178: A new take on 'Life Crisis'

You've likely heard about someone having a quarter-life crisis or a mid-life crisis. Possibly even an end of life crisis.

Perhaps you, like me, have seen media portray this with men buying brand new sports cars and women dying their hair and completely changing their looks.

The vibe I've always gotten from this was more of a negative, judgemental one. A 'oh poor so-and-so, they can't handle their life so they are going to go out and do something "crazy,"' kind of feel.

But what if these crises aren't crazy at all? 

What if the people experiencing them are the most sane out of all of us?

Think about it, they are using a challenging time in their lives to acknowledge things they have always wanted or had an interest in and then going for it and making it happen.

Would we tell a child who has ambitions of being a world renowned mountain climber they're crazy? Or judge them for saving up to buy those really expensive hiking sticks they've been wanting only to use them for summer walks with Grandpa in the field? 

Probably not.

So why do we hate on ourselves and each other once we become adults? 

When did it become a bad or negative or crazy thing to acknowledge an interest and take action towards it?

I'm gonna put my money on jealousy. We see someone doing what they really want and are quick to throw labels on it. 

 

Why? Because deep down, we dont feel that we can do the same. We don't feel that we can have our wants or dreams, that we can't go after them.

Because we're adults and we have responsibilities, damnit!

But oftentimes, these 'responsibilities' are actually fears in disguise.

That's not to say that responsibility doesn't exist. Of course it does. But to the rigid and limiting degree that there is zero possible way life could allow you to explore a long-held interest or dream? 

I'm not buying it.

And neither should you.