Day 65: The magic of pause during growth

Growth at times can be hard. 

It can be exhausting. It can be painful. It can feel like a lot - maybe too much.

And that's ok. 

It is said that when things get tough, feel like too much to bear, that's when transformations and change happen. Like magic. 

Sometimes though, it is also a viable choice to take a break, to pause, to rest.  

This, too, can be like magic.

Restoration during a challenging time rather than soldiering on. How might this change things?

For me, it provides the time and space needed to feel ALL the feels. Especially the ones I'd rather pass through as quick as possible. But with pause, quick is not an option. 

Think of it as emotional fertilizer.  

It takes some time for the nutrients to sink down through the soil. So much time, in some cases, we may question if anything beneficial is happening at all. But emotional fertilizer doesn't have a set timeline.

And neither does personal growth.

So what do we do during this indeterminate time frame?
Observe. Acknowledge. Grow our awareness. Of everything that that comes up - thoughts, feelings, judgements, beliefs, old, new, good, bad - all of it. 

And then we sift through for what feels best for and within us. And we give ourselves permission to leave the rest.

Day 64: Walking the Talk

Walking the talk is harder than it sounds . . . 

To show up how you say you will.
To practice what you preach.
To exude You in every word, thought, and step.

This requires awareness - a lot of it. Awareness of your thoughts. Awareness of your emotions and (physical) feelings. Awareness of your actions.

This requires courage. To do what is right - for you. Even if it causes short term hurts or discomfort.

This requires taking your life (and brain) off of auto-pilot and practicing over and over and over and over again to drive for yourself.

And after a lot of effort and practice, success and struggle, you find yourself. And get to walk in your own light - and dare I say it, love.

Day 63: Wishful Thinking

I found myself in need of a new brush so I went to check out my options at the local Walgreens.

  . . . think I'm gonna go with the free one . . .

Day 62: Time Escaped

Ay, no! It's 9pm already?!

Time really escaped me today . . . Guess it was just a day of tomfoolery . . .

Day 61: The real star is in the background

For your viewing pleasure . . . (and I'm not talking about the small child in front).

Heads are like bowling balls in more ways than just the shape - they can bounce on the floor and still be just fine! If you don't know what I'm talking about, watch again.

Day 60: Two months!!! Here's some art

 

This is one of my favorite collage art pieces I've made. When I started, I had no idea where it was headed. There was no finished image in my mind that I was working towards. Rather, I developed the vision as I went along. Placing a piece here and rearranging it there. 

Ooh, where can I put this?! 

No, that doesn't really work.

Once it was finished I took in what I'd created. 

It took a while to sink in. 

I really had no idea what it meant. There was no agenda or commentary I was trying to make - at least not consciously.

After some thought, I saw how it could easily represent women's disempowerment; always being the brains to the greatness that is created and - more often than not - credited to men.

Interestingly, over time (and as I had prominent shifts in my own life), I began to see a different meaning shine through. Taking a completely different perspective, this work could easily represent complete women's empowerment. The ultimate puppeteer; has the vision and planning to know exactly which moves are needed - and the power to make each character play their part.

It's a nice reminder that everything in life can mean a multitude of different things in different times - to different people, to the same people.

What does it mean to you?

What aspect of your life can you see in a different light, now that time has passed?

Day 59: And if it's a 'maybe'...

And we're back to explore the second point of consideration when navigating that pesky 'Maybe' in decision making.

To review, the factors I find myself falling into in moments of indecision are as follows:

1 - I don't (believe I) have strong feelings either way about something, or

2 - I'm trying to avoid a certain feeling because I think giving a direct answer will cause another person's [less than positive] feelings

 

Buying into the belief that I cause other people's feelings is a huge trap I regularly fall victim to. And retraining my brain to believe the opposite - that I do not cause other people's feelings - is a real challenge. 

 

But it's true. I don't cause anyone else's feelings - and neither do you. Our feelings are always caused by the thoughts we have - and I KNOW I can't control what other people think. 

 

In many cases our thoughts are influenced by how we interpret different situations, events, and interactions. And we can never know for sure how someone else is going to interpret a situation.

If you're like me, you'll assume they have the exact same interpretation as you. But, as life has taught me, this is not the consistent case.

So what to do about it?

All changes start with awareness. 

Awareness can be considered the 'observation' phase. That means no actual 'action' is taken, but rather we're collecting data.

So in the case of decision making, start with becoming aware of what the feeling you are trying to avoid is. What is the emotion? 

 

What does having this emotion say about you?

Every person has such a subconscious soundtrack playing in their head that it can be nearly impossible to pick up on the thoughts we have about ourselves right before a negative emotion strikes.

This is also known as judgement.

But the more effort we put into taking time to pause and identify the emotion - the aftermath of the judgement that we can much more easily feel/identify - the less hidden the subconscious judgements become. Thus, making them easier to pick up in the moment.

Because once we know what's going on in our heads we then have the control to choose what we want to do about it. Bringing us back full circle to the original goal - making decisions, without any 'maybes'.