Think Out Loud

Thinking out loud is a game changer.

We almost always think we don't know - the answer to a problem, how to navigate unfamiliar or challenging territory, etc.

We have convinced ourselves that there is always just one correct
answer
path
solution.

This thinking is both entirely wrong and entirely true. 

It is wrong that in any given circumstance there is only one correct answer, path, solution. 

Yet, it is true that, in any given moment, there will be one answer, path, solution that works best for YOU.

And the easiest way of uncovering what that best answer, path, solution is is to think out loud.

You'll be amazed at what comes out of your mouth when you practice thinking out loud.

And I really do mean practice.

I just had my first real practice - and I had to keep reminding myself "think out loud" because the temptation to edit or restrict myself was so great.

But then I thought, "ok, it's just the same as thinking.. silently..in my head - except now it's coming out of my mouth. That's the only difference."

It felt awkward ["words are hard"] and the impulse to judge some of the thoughts that came out of my mouth was hard to ward off. 

It shut down a lot of my thought paths at first; disrupting the flow and evolution of ideas which would, at some point, turn into beliefs. And - side note - it is the beliefs stage, if any, that we should be judging. The thoughts leading up to the beliefs are just a means to make sense of something and, ideally, a means to understand.

So, allow yourself to think out loud. Give yourself the unrestricted space to explore, process, make sense, and direct your next steps. If you're lucky you'll get takeaways like mine 😜!

*I used a new-to-me transcription app to capture all of the gems I hoped would reveal themselves as I practiced freely thinking out loud and was delighted when it had a summary feature! 

. . . I don't know that I would have summarized my thoughts in this exact way, buut- close enough!

Life is a reflection

Our lives are a reflection of who we are.

Scratch that -

Our lives are a reflection of who we are.

Our lives are a reflection of who we think we are.

Complete with all of the could haves, should haves, would haves, supposed tos, and that's just what you do/how things are that no one can actually trace back to the original rule maker.

Everything is connected.

Nothing exists in isolation.

And, despite what we may have been taught or told, compartmentalizing areas of life does not keep them from interacting with one another.

Our lives are a reflection of how we view life.

Scratch that -

Our lives are a reflection of how we view life.

Our lives are a reflection of how we view ourselves.

. . . let that marinate . . .

Do you like what you see? 

-----------------------

If you're like me you may like some of what you see in your life. And there may be some areas that you really struggle with.

The struggle is a sign.

A sign that what you are seeing,
who you are being,
is no longer matching who you are. 

----------------------

Don't know what to do with that . . . but want to?

Connect with me here to get synced back up with your true self and navigating life in a way that feels and works best for you.

Meat Man

. . . maybe you had to be there . . .

L.E.N.T.

Lent has officially begun and for many Catholics (and other flavors of Christian) that means a period of reflection, self-discipline, and prayer.  

More commonly this plays out as a time of giving things up, not eating meat on Fridays, and trying to 'do better'.  

For many years of my life I don't think I fully grasped the point of Lent. Or rather, I didn't fully see how the things I did or gave up for Lent (saying extra prayers, giving up coffee or sweets) deepened my personal connection with the Creator. I was mostly just counting down those 40 days until Easter.  

Over the past year or so the way I view spirituality, religion, and their associated practices has shifted considerably. 

I've found that the generalized blanket concepts, enticements and threats of these areas don't actually benefit me as much as they could. And I'm willing to bet that if I feel this way, there are plenty of others that do as well.

So, with that in mind, I'll offer a few alternative approaches and perspectives to consider as we pass through this Lenten season - or, let's be real, life in general...

Sin doesn't exist unless judgment is present
What would change for you if 'sins' were viewed as lessons to be learned?
As opportunities for us to grow in understanding of ourselves and consciously choose which actions we want to carry out going forward, rather than judge and condemn ourselves?  

In every moment we have the opportunity to decide if what we are doing is what we want to continue doing. We get to assess and reflect on how it makes us feel, impacts others, and if that is how we want to be and show up in life. If it isn't, then change direction - there is nothing to be ashamed of or judged for that. That's part of learning.

Love for God = Love for Self
What if you didn't need to be 'saved'?
What if you just needed to reconnect to yourself - and thus, God? 

Imagine how much more you could feel and 'see' God's love if you loved yourself.

"Well, that's silly, of course I love myself!" 

Then I'll ask you this, how kind are you to yourself?
How often do you notice your flaws or inadequacies?
How often do you focus on your lack?  

You see, God doesn't see lack.
Because God didn't make you lacking anything.
You were made completely whole.
Yet, as we age in our world, this wholeness often gets chiseled away by the words, actions, and even beliefs of others - of those who came before us. 

We were handed down and taught thoughts and beliefs created long ago, but we weren't [explicitly] taught how to think about them consciously. We weren't taught to connect our thoughts, intuition, and body cues to discern what is uniquely true for us.

So, what if our goal this Lenten season - and all goals in life - started with ourselves?  

What if our intentions were to learn more about ourselves and, thus, who we really are?
God is calling us to be just that - Us.

Lent may be the name of a yearly religious period but it can mean so much more.

L.E.N.T.

Because Life Experiences Necessitate Transformation
And when we Let Experiences Naturally Transform 
we are then able to fully embrace and Live Every New Transition
And when judgment is absent and acceptance is present, we are able to Love Every New Transition.

May we all L.E.N.T. - in this season and every season.

Day 340: The End

Well, we finally made it!

A full year since I started my daily challenge to write (or draw) every day for 365 days.

So, how'd I do?

Well, if the title of this post is any indication (it's really not), I did . . .

Pretty.
Darn.
AWESOME.

That's right, in a year of life - full of ups, downs, sideways and neutrals - I missed only 25 days of writing. 

That's less than a month! 

And if we want to get technical about it, we could calculate that out to writing 93% of the year. And if we were assigning grades . . .  that's a solid A . . . 

Regardless of the metrics, the challenge served its ultimate purpose:
   1) to get back into a regular writing practice
   2) to create a space to expand on and develop my understanding of different life concepts, tools and experiences.

In a year of writing, I have learned that - 

• We can change our minds; and to do so is natural.
  To change is to grow. Thus, changing one's mind about something could actually indicate growth taking or having taken place.
  As the saying goes:
  Grow or Die
  
  
• Meaning can be found in literally ANYTHING.
  It just might take changing the angle or perspective with which we view it to pull something new.
  
  
• We can inspire ourselves.
  It's been cool to re-read older posts and experience a moment of awe (or 'ahh' - depending on how you look at it!).
  Feeling sensations of heart warming, chest expanding, and thoughts shouting 'yes! THIS!' in agreement with past me.
  We don't always need to turn to others for inspiration.
  And we don't need accreditation to inspire ourselves (or others).
  We can stoke our own fire.
  But we have to be open to feeling the heat - and seeing the flame [i.e. our true selves].
  
  
• Making yourself do something isn't as helpful as it seems.
  Force doesn't always result in the most fruitful outcomes.
  More often, it's ease and flexibility that bring me the most success;
  The times when I allow my interests in the moment to direct my next actions, trusting (and knowing) that everything I want to get done, will. This is still very much a work in progress, but so is life.
  
  
• Judgement Sucks . . . the joy, learning, and opportunity out of everything.
  When I started to get a handle on reeling in and reducing my rampant judging of others, situations, and myself - boy, did life start to feel different!
  Things felt lighter - I felt lighter.
  I was able to better understand others and think about situations differently than I had before.
  Judging less means more joy.
  
  
• Perspective is EVERYTHING.
  This is no new news.
  And I've been saying it like a broken record over the past year - because it's true.
  Shift your perspective and you shift your world.
  
  
• Trust in self isn't possible without understanding of self.
  Learn what you really think and believe.
  All of those things that 'some people' or 'other people' think - if their words are coming out of your mouth, they are your thoughts.
  Build your awareness of them.
  Learn to identify them.
  Then practice deciphering them.
  It's the only way to uncover what is true to you.
  If fear is born out of uncertainty and the unfamiliar. Get to know yourself and breed the opposite.
   
• Second guessing yourself = shutting the door on an opportunity.
  An opportunity to listen to yourself.
  An opportunity to trust yourself (re: point above)
  An opportunity to grow your intuition.
  An opportunity to grow - yourself.
  
  
• The key to happiness is knowing yourself.
  I penned this as the slogan of my coaching website way before I understood how true it really was. And as I've grasped and experienced this reality, I've also learned that knowing myself will be a life-long thing - because I am constantly changing.
  We all are.
  And it's a really cool and fascinating thing to be able to not only experience, but witness it - through conscious awareness of self.
  
  
• We are what and who we need.
  When we allow ourselves (and others) to change . . .
  When we look for the meaning in everything . . .
  When we inspire ourselves . . .
  When we welcome in more ease and flexibility . . .
  When we judge less . . .
  When we shift our perspective . . .
  When we trust ourselves . . .
  When we listen to ourselves and hear our intuition . . .
  When we are consciously aware of who we are . . .
  
  We are what and who we need - in every changing moment.

At the close of this year of writing, I'm still undecided what the next challenge will be. But, I can say with full confidence that writing will still continue be a regular thing. 

Though, perhaps not a daily occurrence.

Day 339: Ready for Heaven

I passed a man on the sidewalk today wearing a jacket with a picture of a skeleton on it that read, "Ready for Heaven."

He got me thinking, why do we have to die in order to experience bliss, completion, heaven?

Maybe we don't. 

 

Now, I'm not saying that there is a way to make life perfect.
Because as we know, perfection is impossible.
But, perhaps there is a way to experience a life that we like. Dare I say it - a way to experience a life that we love?

Of course, this doesn't mean loving every second of every moment non-stop forever and ever.
That too, would be impossible.
It is possible, however, to experience life in a way that feels good to you and to experience that feeling of good as your baseline state.

What if living a "good life" - living a life you love - wasn't about always having pleasurable / enjoyable experiences? 

What if it was more about simply experiencing - period?

What if a "good life" was simply a life full of experiences?
Experiences in which you are fully present. Fully in the present to take in all aspects, nuances, emotions, thoughts, sensations, connections, etc of the moment at hand.
And then of every moment that follows it.
Fully soaking in what it means to be alive through every experience. 

And not through the eyes of despair, disempowerment, or suffering. But through the eyes of curiosity, hope, and joy.

What would experiencing life like that be like?

 

Would it feel like Heaven on Earth?
Like the undefinable peace and joy beyond our wildest imagination and comprehension?

Is that even possible?

I don't know.

But, I do know that we hold the keys to our own reality. To the life we live day to day and the way we experience it.

If we aren't ready for heaven on Earth, how can we be ready for heaven in the cosmos?

That's a serious question.

Our perspective and level of consciousness doesn't automatically elevate as soon as we die and leave our bodies.
We have to change it.
But more importantly, we have to realize that we can change it.
And once we do, changes happen instantly.

On Earth, however, things aren't instant.

But that doesn't remove our ability to create change. It just takes a little longer to see and get what we want.

Day 338: Manifesting

I always thought the term 'manifesting' was just fluffy wordage thrown around by people trying to tell you how to obtain a pipe dream.  That it was all woo-woo, non-credible or illegitimate. And that those trying to 'manifest' were trying to get out of doing the hard work; wanting something else to do the heavy lifting behind the scenes so that these good things/wants 'just happened.'

I don't think I really understood what 'manifesting' was (I'm noticing a trend here...). And I kept getting thrown off by my perception of the effort and energy required to create a new reality.

I have very much believed that I loved 'creating something out of nothing.' I believed that this could only be done with dedication, hard work, determination, and creative expression.

These things are true, but I might have also been making things more difficult for myself with that viewpoint.

A new concept I'm working on wrapping my mind around right now is the idea that there is never 'nothing.'

Something can never be created from nothing.

It's scientifically impossible. Unless, maybe, you're a black hole.

This something is called Energy.

Meaning, there is ALWAYS something - even if you can't see or perceive it - in every place, space, and moment.

We can also think of this something - this Energy - as the difference between stillness and movement.

Everything in our world is in constant motion. Even when, to the average eye, things appear still they are, indeed, experiencing movement. (Think back to middle school science class and learning about the structure of the atom - hello, electrons! you speedracers, you...)

So, to adopt the phrase and belief that I like "creating something out of nothing" I'm making things much harder for myself.

Why?

Inertia - a body at rest, will stay at rest unless acted upon by an outside force.

Generating movement from stillness requires a LOT of energy and effort. Especially compared to generating continued movement from something already experiencing motion in some way.

Ok, fine. But if energy is all around us - in everything - then why do some endeavors seem so difficult?

Because we don't believe there is movement.

We can't see movement, thus we believe things are in stillness.

Let's elevate the example a bit-

We can't see what we really want (in our reality or imagination), thus we believe we can never have it, achieve it, be worthy of it, etc. [We stop the movement]

It's all matter of perspective.

It's all a matter of trust - Self trust.

And self trust is a matter of self knowledge.

If you know yourself deeply, you understand yourself. And if you understand yourself, you start to trust yourself. And if you trust yourself, you believe in yourself.

And it is from this foundation that life starts to change on a massive scale.

 

So . . . what does this have to do with motion, energy and manifesting. . . ?

 

A lot. 

 

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines 'manifest' as:

• readily perceived by the senses and especially by the sense of sight
• easily understood or recognized by the mind
• to make evident or certain by showing or displaying
  

Since Energy is motion and makes up everything, we can view our thoughts as energy as well.

 

Thoughts that support and benefit us give us more energy to work with - thus making things seem easier. Meanwhile, thoughts that restrict, limit, or lessen us require more energy just to think. Therefore, they leave us with less energy overall - and things seem harder and require more effort or force.

When we manifest, we take the three definition points above (though in a slightly different order) and apply them to our thoughts, mindsets and behaviors.

1. Recognize and understand what you really want
   [easily understood or recognized by the mind]
   This is where the whole self-knowledge, self-trust, self-belief cycle comes into play.
   
   
2. Consciously perceive by the senses what this want does for you
   [readily perceived by the senses and especially by the sense of sight]
   If this want were already your reality, how would you be able to sense it - how could you tell?
   What would your energy levels (physical, mental, emotional) be like?
   
   
3. Get clear on what it would look like - how the want would show up or display - in your life
   [to make evident or certain by showing or displaying]
   Adopt the mindset and behaviors that would correspond to those of already having the want
   

To manifest something is not to make it magically appear or happen - it's to consciously choose the path you want to travel down by first identifying the destination (or outcome). Then, once the destination is clear, working backwards to identify the steps to get there.

You can think of it like 'fake it until you make it' except you don't have to fake anything.

 

All you have to do is believe in yourself and travel in the direction of that.