Day 152: Improving Balance

Last Thursday I became a ninja.

Well, a Windy City Ninja.

Ok, so I took my first class at Windy City Ninja.

Soooooo, I'm pretty sure that makes my ninja status official.
Recorded.
On the books.

I was a little bit nervous but mostly excited leading up to class.

"It's a humbling experience," the instructor told me . . . and then the other two ppl who rounded out our class of three.

"Some things will be easy and others challenging. You'll see where your strengths lie."

She was right.
Balancing, I learned, is not my strongest skill.

Give me an 8 ft, 10 ft, or 14ft warped wall and I'll crush them all. But a stationary pipe, mere inches above the ground? Forget about it. And don't even think about the moving beam!

Could this real-life physical feat serve as symbolism for life in a broader sense?

You bet!

Oftentimes, it's the smallest, most basic-seeming things that require the most attention.  

How many times have you ever talked about a topic and uttered (or heard) the words 'that's just how it is' or 'they say you're supposed to...' when you don't have background information as to Why it is or know who They are?

 

It is statements like these that keep us off balance.

Why?

Because they fuel unconscious beliefs about how life should look. And if you are stepping onto the balance beam with beliefs that you don't agree with - and you don't even recognize you have - you are going to be carrying a LOT of extra, uneven weight.

 

Improving your balance in life starts with giving more attention to the thoughts you have.

By questioning where certain thoughts come from - most especially when they include (anything remotely close to) how someone or something "is suppose to be" - you'll reveal beliefs you likely didn't know you had.

 

With this new awareness, you have the power to keep the belief or leave it for something that suits you better. 

 

And with this deliberately given attention, your weight is redistributed for better balance - on and off the beam.

Day 151: Transformation in Progress

I admitted to a friend a secret I discovered about myself . . . Often, when I think jokes in my head, they are narrated in a Jerry Seinfeld voice.

Then I looked in my cupboard and saw how my cereal stock has grown from the usual, single box . . . 

The transformation has begun! 

Look-out world, the Seinfeld-version of Sarah is on the horizon!

Day 150: The ease of breaking

As a coach, I help clients break down their goals and challenges into smaller, more manageable pieces in order to conquer them.

As a human, this is something I struggle with. 

I've only recently learned the real ease that comes from breaking things down. Interestingly enough, this revelation firmly started to root when working on a challenge at work. A challenge I found incredibly frustrating and increasingly complicated the more I tried to solve it.

What made it so frustrating and complicated was trying to find a single solution for the entire thing. 

 

If something is complicated, that's a pretty good indicator that it involves different components. And if components are different, then it would make sense for them to be handled uniquely.

For the longest time, my focus was on finding a single solution to an entire problem. However, as I learned through my work challenge - and life in general - this approach isn't always helpful.

As I considered each component on it's own I noticed that my problem-solving felt . . . different. With each isolated component given its own attention, small steps of progress were visible. And rather than feeling frustrated that I didn't know the answer to the entire challenge, I felt motivated and encouraged by the small progress made. Confident that, with progress in each different area, the way to connect everything back together would become clearer as I went.

This approach feels light-years better than expecting to figure everything out all at once and putting pressure on yourself to do so.

I'm hopeful this was the experience needed to cement this breaking practice into habit. And at the very least, it will be a great framework to return to when faced with future challenges.

Day 149: Whys >Whats

I'd rather hear about the 'whys' than the 'whats'.

Especially when getting to know someone. To better understand what's important to them and directs their decision making.

Because we always base our decisions around what is most important to us in the moment. 

- Maybe that's getting acknowledged by others 

or

- being true to yourself

-It could be for finances

or

- travel

or

- family

It's different for everyone and it changes over time.

So, the more we can understand our 'whys' the more we can understand each other.

Day 148: Just keep swimming

This phrase was uttered during a recent coaching session.

Why?

As a way for my client to remind themself that things don't need to be perfect or clear in order to progress forward. 

This was a good reminder for me as well. 

I'll catch myself stalling with thoughts of "once I know how to solve this problem, things will get better" or "after I get clear on X, then I'll do this thing I feel intimidated by." 

But the reality is I don't need to wait for things to get better or for clarity before taking action. 

I just need to keep swimming. 

I just need to be willing to learn as I go.

It doesn't matter the direction. It doesn't matter the pace. Movement of any kind will always course correct to where we need to be when we are actively observing and learning from our experiences and the things around us.

Day 147: City Folk

Move out of the way, Babe. You're not the only farm animal in the city!
These ducks don't look like they're messing around.

They've straight up abandoned the pond and lakefront and are taking over the streets.

Who run the world? Ducks, apparently.

 

Day 146: Life Events

I recently attended a good friend's bachelorette party. It took place in Nashville, a town known for being a bachelorette destination.

I wasn't too familiar with the city, as I'd never been there before. Which makes sense because I'm not a big country music fan. But for this special party I figured it would be a good time. And so did the bride.

We later discovered however, that some life events come with built in expectations. Expectations that need to be examined prior to the event in order to avoid disappointment. 

 

This was one such occasion.

Too bad we made it to this realization after the fact.

What were the unexplored expectations?

- That bachelorette parties are a wild time. 

- That they're filled with a lot of drinking and shrieking and attention-grabbing. 

- That they facilitate mingling and excitement. That they're the best party ever.

Or something along those lines . . . 

Our celebration didn't really look like that. 

The bride confessed to me her disappointment.

"It's just not what I was expecting. I was wanting to talk to people and mingle with other brides, cheering them on. I wanted to go somewhere and dance. And I tried really hard to like the music, but I just can't get into it..."

It appeared our celebration caught a case of the "shoulds." Trying to live up to the criteria our society paints of what a celebration of such a life event 'should' look like. 

Expectations of this kind don't take into consideration any unique identifiers such as, say, personality, tastes and preferences, influencers of enjoyment and comfort. You know, the things that make us all different.

 

So what type of expectations don't lead to disappointment? None, really. But more realistically, the expectations we set for ourselves in terms of how we experience things.  

Rather the resting the weight of satisfaction or enjoyment on external factors outside of our control (ex- strangers, music venues, etc), we can reel it in a bit to focus on the things that actually make experiences pleasant - our perception and interpretation of them.

When we shift the focus from external to internal, (how we view situations and are present in the moment) it becomes much easier to enjoy ourselves and create memories we want to remember.

Day 145: Intentional Pick-me-up

I went for a nature walk today looking for a pick-me-up after work. 

Pretty sure I was looking for something to magically grab my attention and throw me into a state of awe. And thus, a sort of reset.

[Because that's what usually happens on a nature walk! I see something really captivating and am filled with delight and awe. After that I always feel so calm and peaceful (if not a little excited)].

Kind of like seeing this photo from a different day.

I was looking for that feeling. 

But I wasn't really looking. I was more so hoping.

If I had been looking I would have sought out the hidden.

But today, I just wanted a quick fix that I didn't have to take any ownership over or exert any extra effort into.

Which is probably why this guy was the most eye catching thing I saw... 

It was a good reminder* that we get what we seek. 

To seek something out requires intention. Without intention, we're resigned to a life of taking what we're given - even if we don't want it.

*my original typo read: It was a god reminder, which I think is also accurate

Day 144: Innocent, yet inappropriate sounding quotes

I found a list I had written in Uganda - a decade ago. 

It was hilarious quotes of mine and Katie's that would have sounded inappropriate taken out of context. So here they are, largely out of context. 

*********************

“Cat, get out of my pants!”
[self-explanatory] But, in case it's not. At the house we rented there was a cat named Meow. If memory serves, Meow was getting cozy with a pair of Katie's leggings on the floor.

“If you come between my legs one more time, I’m going to squeeze you!!!”
[Me to the cat rubbing in between my legs]

“Come to mama”
[squeezing into the back of the car]

“Are you down for some action?” ‘I’m down for some action!’
[watching Mission Impossible]

“I need some more juice for my stick”
[usb internet modem]

“Should we take this to the bedroom?”
[cookie dough and parks & rec]

“Don’t worry, I don’t need you to take my bra off for me. I can do it with one hand.”
[Katie hurt her wrist so she can only really use one]

Day 143: The only way is Through

If you find yourself feeling resistance, avoidance, or just 'not good' regarding a particular situation, it's likely your inner self trying to tell you something.

And in my experience, the message is generally one I don't care to hear because it means . . . 

I can't go over it

I can't go around it

I have to go through it

Facing any feelings that do not feel good and peaceful is the quickest, most powerful way to shift them. 

It starts with answering - what am I actually feeling?
I don't know, but I don't like it!!

That's fair. If I were to guess what I'm feeling, what might that be? 
. . . ok, ok, I might be feeling . . [x]

Alright, now we're getting somewhere!

Next step - what are the thoughts fueling this feeling?

Continue this processes to chisel down deeper and deeper to get to the core of the discomfort. Even if it doesn't completely remove every ounce of discomfort, it should greatly reduce it's power.

**************

And don't forget, this type of quest into the unknown is only carried out by the brave.
You're a beast.
Don't let your fear laden thoughts convince you otherwise.

Day 142: Travel vs. Explore

"I love to travel." 
                               "I wish I could travel more."
                                                                                    "I can't wait to travel again."

I've been reading and hearing these sentiments a lot lately.  And it got me thinking about my own views on traveling and exploration. I'd never given it much thought before and here is what I discovered.

To travel and to explore are two different things.

To travel is to physically go to a different location.

To explore is to learn and grow.

I prefer to explore.

I prefer to have experiences that catch my eye, stimulate my mind, and touch my soul. 

This can happen while traveling. For instance, learning about different lifestyles or taking in new sights through interactive experiences. I want to be doing things unique to the place I am in. That's why I travel - to explore somewhere new.

But exploration can also happen from my own couch. I can explore just by inspecting my own thoughts and taking things in from different angles. I don't actually need to travel anywhere.

How interesting . . . 

To travel and to explore both present new opportunities, but they are definitely not one and the same.

Which do you crave more?

Day 141: Live Life like a Coaching Session

A very freeing thought occurred to me recently - 

I can live life like a coaching session.
I don't have to have everything tied up at the end.  
I can leave it wherever it is and reflect on what I've learned so far and the direction I can keep exploring.

This revelation was huge. And the use of 'revelation' is not exaggerated.

I shared the other day how Perfectionism's got it's hooks in deep in many areas of my life. This idea - to live life like in a coaching session - I believe, is powerful enough to disengage these hooks in a big way.

Why?

Because in [life] coaching, the goal is not to 'solve' something. The goal it's to 'understand' it. 

What happens when you understand something clearly?

The next steps, actions, and directions become obvious - they seem to reveal themselves. [Some may also call this a solution. ;)]

Whenever I have a session with my own coach, no matter where we are at in our exploration at the end of the hour, I always feel good and satisfied about where we leave things. Not because I always get to a crystal clear understanding of the topic at hand, but because I have explored areas - from angles previously unseen - that give me a different perspective to further consider.

I have a clear path forward to direct my focus, even if I haven't 'solved my problem.'

The reality of such sessions are:

• I still have some loose ends and things I don't know the answer to
• I have greater insight - and thus information - to call upon in order to approach the situation differently (/more effectively)
• There is reduced pressure to know how to do it/fix it/change it - i.e. reduced pressure to be perfect
   

If I can have this experience of greater freedom and ease in a coaching session, why couldn't I have it in life in general?

I can.

You can.

We can.

Not gonna lie, it takes Practice! And it's not instant or fast. But when we shift our focus to understanding over solutions, life starts feeling way better.

Day 140: Perfectionism Trap

A theme that keeps resurfacing for me lately is perfectionism.

The more I've been learning about myself, the less hidden this trip-up is becoming - which is great! And it's also really annoying.

"Ugh, Perfectionism, you strike again!!"

This thought has popped into my head more times than I would like over the past few months.

It's quite mind blowing how massively deep and wide the hold perfectionism has on my life; from which all-or-nothing thinking is a result.

I thought about making a list of all the areas perfectionism tries to control. But got overwhelmed at the idea and no longer wanted to do it (or perhaps didn't want to see it). It's a long list. Of that, I'm certain.

So, if perfectionism is such a puppet-master, how do I know when it's at work?

This will be different for each of us, but for me it shows up most prominently in the following ways:

• There is no middle ground. It's one thing or the other, right or wrong, good or bad.
• Things need to be instant. 
• A learning curve is NOT ok. 
• If you don't have the answers, you're failing. 
• And if you're not naturally skilled at something then you might as well not even try.

Ouch. This last one for me is particularly painful to realize. 

As someone who has always been pretty 'high-achieving' (by whose standards, specifically? I can't even tell you), I did what came easily to me: academics and art. 

The message was cemented in my little brain at a very young age that the areas in which I received outside validation were the areas I needed to spend my time.

Seeing this with fresh eyes as an adult is gross.

I've been holding myself back in soooo many ways and didn't even know it! Missing out on the thrill of trying new things, enjoying the process, and ultimately expanding my potential.

Why?

Because of fear.

The fear of not being good enough.

I think this is a fear we all have, in some form. The question I'm learning to ask myself now is:  

Good enough for who?

Day 139: Late Night Cravings

When a craving strikes, check-in with all areas of the body associated.

For example, I got the idea that I had a taste for sweets.

My tongue was salivating.

 

 

I checked in with my stomach - it was closed for the night.

 
Stomach already had it's slippered feet up and was sitting behind a newspaper.

Hmm, doesn't look like you two are in agreement. Stomach has the final call on this kind of thing and he's not interested in sweets right now.

And with that, the craving had no other choice than to scram!
...After peeking through the window a few more times...

Day 138: Political Thoughts from the Porcelain Throne

Sometimes the greatest inspiration or insight strikes while occupying the Porcelain Throne. 

As you will quickly see, the below is no exception. And perhaps it's a little too literal for some. 

If that is your experience, I make no apologies.
I give you:  

Potty Politics

 

Day 137: Thoughts of 2019

I found some old thoughts scribbled on scrap paper recently. 

Every time this happens it's always interesting to see what I wrote.
And often, I'll find myself reading something that leaves me feeling (dare I say it?!) inspired or moved in some way.  

[affirmative head nod] 'Ok, past me . . . !'

 

This time it was the cats & babies idea, obviously.

 

- True story by the way! 

I was riding the bus with my sister years ago and I heard what sounded like a cat.

"Did you hear that?" I asked my sister. "That sounded like a cat!"

I turned around, completely expecting to see a baby behind me somewhere. 

There was no baby.

What I did see was a woman with a cat carrier sitting on her lap and a little kitty face peeking out through the door.

"There IS a cat on the bus!!"

I had never been so excited on public transportation.

Well, that's not true. I was pretty darn excited when I saw the squirrel - but that's a story for another day.

 

You can't see the date, but these thoughts were penned in 2019 - almost to the day, June 9th-ish.

It's always so cool, a bit surprising, and reassuring to see that the new ways of thinking and perspectives I am fully shifting into in present day, were making themselves knows in the past in subtle ways.

It's easy to forget that we really do know the things [thoughts/perspectives/beliefs] that are best for us. These notes are proof - at least to me!

I think the disconnect comes from the lack of awareness and understanding of how to actually incorporate such self-knowledge.

In case you couldn't read from the pictures above, here are the wise bits [edited for spelling/grammar]:

No human is ever destined for just one thing. That's why we change and grow.

 &

No one truly knows, without any doubts, what they are doing.
But we all have our areas that we feel "completely in our element."
Perhaps it's seeing others in those areas that leads us to
believe the lie that everyone has their life figured out.

With these ideas in mind, we can start to integrate them by asking ourselves:

What growth have I experienced over the years?
What opportunities became available to me because of the growth?
Given the changes I've already experienced, what's possible for me in the future?

When do I feel "completely in my element" (no matter the duration of time)?
What happens when I feel "completely in my element"?
What factors might I be able to incorporate into every day life?

Day 136: Hair Indecision

 

Day 135: Avocado Trix

Oh my, what happened here? 

It may have been a not so great pack job in my backpack . . . 

Or . . . it could have been the start of the greatest new 

taste sensation to hit the nation . . . !

Day 134: Baggage = Future Luggage

Let's talk about Baggage.

Baggage gets a bad rap - especially when it comes to relationships. Especially in regards to women.

"She's got a lot of baggage."

'I don't want to deal with anyone's baggage.'

Baggage, baggage, baggage.  

Baggage is bad, Bad, BAD.

And if you've got it, there's something wrong with you and no one will want to deal with it. Thus no one will want to deal with you.

WHOA. That's a lot. 

And it doesn't feel good at all.

So allow me to offer an alternative perspective.

Baggage - the emotional, mental, and perhaps even physical experiences, traumas, beliefs, and view points of one's lived experience - is not bad. 

Collect all of the baggage you can. It's proof of living.

Baggage can, however, be heavy.

This is why it's important to sort through the baggage. This will happen at different times, for different people. There is no rule for when this needs to happen or what it needs to look like. 

But it needs to happen in order to live a life that feels free and light. 

We've [all] got to go through our own baggage so we can lighten our own loads. 

We've got to upgrade to some wheels. 

We can think of going through our baggage as we would sorting through a plentiful wardrobe. 

We can't wear all of the things we've accumulated, and likely we don't want to. We have the opportunity to curate the exact look, feel, and learned life lessons we want to keep and use in the future.

We get to choose what we pack in our luggage.

And that's the difference. 

Baggage is simply future luggage. We just haven't done the sorting yet.

Day 133: Bad Luck or Good Luck?

I played horseshoes with my sister a few weekends ago. 

Boy, was the game full of surprises - and I'm not even referring to my consistent and accurate aim!

Surprise #1 - Hidden Loot
The park we play horseshoes in has a row of 10ish throwing pitches. We have a pitch we typically play at, and this time was no different. However, something did catch our eye in the pitch next to us. 

Was that stake freshly painted?

Naturally, we investigated. As we began lifting up the pitch cover we saw something -

it was a purse!

WHOA! My brain immediately started running various scenarios as to how the purse got there and what might be inside.

The purse was clearly hidden intentionally. Also clear to us was the need to look inside the purse. What if we could return it?

"Don't touch it! Use a stick," my sister smartly advised.

I grabbed the stick she offered me and lifted the opening of the unzipped top pouch. We peered inside and saw . . .

a set of horseshoes! All 4 of them!!

I think we both breathed a slight sigh of relief. Neither of us wanted to play Good Samaritan at the moment.

Surprise #2 - Horseshoes can break
In what inevitably became our last round of the game we discovered something we never thought possible. Horseshoes can break. Like, snap in half, sort of break.

My sister threw her final shoe. As it hit the ground I saw something fly upon impact.

"Your shoe just broke!"

'What?! No, it didn't!'

It did. 

'What's a broken horseshoe supposed to mean? We should look it up!' 

It was such an unexpected and shocking occurrence we were sure there had to be some significance.

*******

Later that evening we looked up the meaning of a broken horseshoe.

...oof - it meant bad luck...

But finding horseshoes is said to be good luck. And we found FOUR.

So, surely that would cancel any shifts of luck and leave us the same as we were. Right???

I don't know. But honestly, it doesn't matter. Because, whether you believe in luck or not, perspective is everything.

Think about it - if your perspective is that you 'have luck,' what is your outlook like?
What's your attitude like?
How do you perceive challenges when you 'have luck' on your side?

The answers to these questions will reveal what your perspective of 'having luck' is - regardless of if you find a horseshoe, a four leaf clover, a leprechaun* or simply exist.

We can all live lives filled with 'luck' - and it starts with our perspective.

*let the record show I spelled this right on the first try (and I find it a hard word to spell)!

Day 132: Where are you looking?

Often what we see is quickly determined within a manner of seconds, if not less.

Because of this reason, I challenge you to pick an item and take it in.

Take it ALL in.

Consider different perspectives and layers of focus. Train your eye.

For instance, take this Dandelion seed head:

Ok, I've seen these before. Looks like pretty much every other seeding Dandelion I've seen . . . 

Great! Now look closer, through different levels of focus . . .

. . . these pictures just look increasingly blurry . . .

To the untrained eye. To the quick eye. To the impatient eye. Yes, that's probably true.

But to the observant and lingering eye they show different parts.

The Obvious : The surface, the seed heads closest to us.

The Perceptible : The middle ground, the seed stems.

The Hidden : The back side, the seed heads farthest away from us.

These three parts  - the obvious, the perceptible, and the hidden - are found in everything. 

In every person, place, and thing.  

In every idea and theory. 

In every dream and wish.

Each part brings with it deeper complexity. And with deeper complexity comes greater understanding.

We can choose to live the obvious, surface level life. A life in which no extra time or consideration is taken to what we do or why we do it.

We can choose to explore the perceptible, middle ground life. A life in which a moderate amount of time and consideration is taken to assess the factors of life surrounding us. A life of greater meaning.

We can choose to unlock the hidden life. A life in which great time and consideration is taken to determine what brings us happiness, meaning and satisfaction. A life that once didn't even seem possible or we didn't even know existed. A life that feels and does good.

We get to choose.

Train your eye. 

And remember to always ask yourself - where are you looking?

Day 131: Hair Wars

Crew: "The temperature's dropping fast, Captain!"

Captain: "Lower the windows!!"

 

- when cold air blows, the arm hair strikes back -

Day 130: Values Byproduct

hint... it's more values!

As I mentioned yesterday, over time our values can change. The timeline of such a change depends on the person, their situation, and their perspective.

 

Over the past few years, I've been going through a LOT of changes (perspective, mindset, confidence, self-worth, etc, etc). So I've checked in on several different occasions to see where my values were sitting.

 

A few days ago was my latest check-in. I was trying to remember the order of my last ranking but couldn't bring to mind which value rounded out the top 5. 

 

Remembering that I had made some values cards a while back, I pulled them out and looked over the 10 different values represented.

Instantly, I began arranging my top five.

 

Interesting - value #5 has changed!

 

What I realized after was that the remaining five values (peace/calm, achievement, passion, purpose, learning) can only be achieved when one or more of my top 5 are being carried out. 

 

For example, in order for me to feel fully at peace I need to feel a strong sense of connection and joy. Or, for me to experience passion I need creativity and humor leading the mix.

 

All other values in my life are the byproducts of living under the direction of my top values.

Wow!

Day 129: Values Compass

Two years ago, on my very first day of coach training with iPEC, we did an exercise I absolutely loved.

 

In the exercise we discussed the concept of values - the key aspects that guide what we do and how we do things.

 

We were given a list of values and told to pick our top 5.
I chose: 

- connecting to others

- creativity

- honesty

- joy

- respect

We then generated lists of the key descriptors of who we are. Again, picking out our top 5, then making sure they were in noun form. 

Mine were: 

- creative

- joy

- empathy

- optimism

- openness
(this is a sneaky way of tapping into your top values by thinking about what makes you, you)

How interesting! Some of the values I selected match with top descriptors of myself!

Next, we ranked, for a final time, our top five personal descriptors in order of importance - and added "I am" in front of each one.

My number one statement? I am Joy

 

Wow. I like that. It feels good! . . . Why can't I stop smiling?

 

I couldn't stop smiling because I had discovered a truth about myself. At my core and in my most authentic state of being, I am joyful. I am joy.

 

***************

 

As we go through life and time, some of our values will shift. But some will always stay the same. 

For me, Joy is a permanent value. 

Why does this matter? 

Because when we know what our values are we can use them as tools for making decisions, prioritizing, and even setting expectations.

 

When we know what our values are we are better able to authentically engage in and enjoy life.

Day 128: Mealworm Brownies

I had an aging zucchini in my fridge, amongst a number of other veggies in dire need of some attention.

I mentioned to my sister that I needed to use them up and she quickly suggested:

"You should make me zucchini brownies!" 

"Yeah, sure," I noncommittally replied. I don't think that either one of us really believed brownies were going to be made.

A few days later, to the surprise of us both, they WERE!

However, it wasn't without a few bumps along the way. As with most things in life.

Bump #1  .... I don't think I grated the zucchini fine enough

I used my food processor to grate the zucchini then put together the incredibly dry 'batter'. 

When I added the zucchini, something looked seriously off about what I saw.
"Oh my gosh, this looks like worms in dirt! It looks like mealworms - the yuckiest kind!"

But I kept mixing, skeptical that the geriatric zucchini would add enough moisture to turn the cocoa/flour dirt into anything other than powder.

Not only was I questioning the size of my zucchini shreds at this point, but also my choice of using coconut oil - an oil that hardens in cooler temperatures.
"But it was hot in my apartment! Surely it will work ok?!?"

Bump #2  .... I don't think I can call this brownie batter

So, the zucchini did NOT have enough moisture to wet the mixture into a sludge or even a large clump! And I had no idea what effect the coconut oil was having, if any.

It was time to call in reinforcements - several tablespoons of milk!

I used unsweetened coconut milk for the job. Seemed perfect since I had already used the coconut oil. Better stick with the same flavor profile, right?

I shake up the carton and pour in my first tablespoon (glug, glug).

I step away from the kitchen for a moment and quickly return to add tablespoon #2.
Glug, glug - ewww!! What is that white stuff?! Is that some sort of mold?!

I really don't know. What I do know is that I now had tiny white globs of something floating at the top of my tablespoon.

Does coconut milk have 'pulp'?? Is that why you're suppose to shake it? I questioned hopefully.

Clearly I wasn't too disturbed by the mysterious forms because, not only did I not care enough to look up the answer, but I felt the only action needed was to scoop off the white globs and continue with the few remaining tablespoons.

That did the trick - the batter was nice and moist!

Bump #3  .... hmm, maybe just a few more minutes

Nope! Didn't need a few more minutes. I over baked them. Not too bad, but the edges were certainly on the drier side (just begging for ice cream!).

When all was said and done - and I got a good piece from the middle - the brownies turned out Great! They were pretty moist and definitely delicious.

So why share the little details about this baking (mis)adventure? 

Because it's part of life. 

In every single experience we have, things will turn out different than we expect. It could happen at a particular step along the way. It could be an ultimate outcome.

Whatever happens, no matter what it is, is neither 'good' nor 'bad'. It is our interpretation and perspective of the situation or experience that makes it so.

When we are able to take a break from judging situations as soon as they deviate from what we want, we give ourselves the opportunity to fully experience the moment.

Take my mealworm brownie batter. It really looked disgusting to me. And I did not think it was going to turn out well at all, especially since it was so dry and powdery. 

Past Sarah might have gotten upset by the situation "[boo-hoo] I was just trying to do something nice for my sister (and my stomach) and it's not even working!"

But instead, I took in the situation objectively without judgement. And would you believe it? That allowed me to have fun in the situation I found myself!

What could have been a complaint was now a joke:

AND, it spurred an idea I otherwise never would have thought of - Coconut milk pulp.

Remaining open to whatever situations come your way is the key difference between eating mealworms and eating chocolate*.

*Or whatever it is that you like to eat.
Maybe it's the mealworms! If so, I'll give you my share.

Day 127: Real-time Bird Bath

I finally caught it in the act! 

By 'it' I mean a bird and by 'in the act' I mean bathing.

[GASP] You WATCHED someone else take a bath?!

No - I watched someone else get OUT of a bath.

Take a look for yourself! (please pardon my dirty window)

 

 

I think this Starling gives a good reminder that we always have access to exactly what we need. Though, it may look a bit different than what we envision in our mind's eye.

May we all be more like birds - finding our bathtubs in whatever place holds water (and gives a bit of privacy!)

Day 126: Life Changing vs. Life Confirming

I've always felt resistance to using the term 'life changing.'  It always sounded so cliche and didn't feel genuine to me.

When I think about it more, I suppose it's because I interpret it as an implied specific moment when life changed. As if a switch was flipped and things were suddenly different. 

Now I can certainly see how this phrasing would apply to say, childbirth, but in situations of personal view and perspective shifts, I just can't make the leap.

Because to me, there is no switch. There is no obvious 'this' or 'that.' To me, perspective shifts are gradual, albeit with some occasional attention grabbers.

It's because of this gradation and complexity of life circumstances that I more strongly connect with the idea of 'life confirming' [events].

This implies a journey. 

This implies exploration and curiosity.

This implies learning and growth.

This implies the human experience.

- At least, it does to me.

I think about my own life experiences. One of the most prominent was my time living and working in Uganda. 

Was it life changing? No.
Was it life confirming? Yes.

So, what's the difference?

It wasn't life changing because it didn't change my view of life (though it undeniably influenced aspects). It didn't make me rethink how I'm living or want to go down a completely new path.

It did, however, confirm some hunches, interests, and inner desires that I had been mildly aware of for some time. It did validate my decision [to go to Africa] and the choices I'd made up to that point in life. And it confirmed in profound ways the inner longings of my heart.

I didn't need to change with this experience. In fact, the exact opposite of change was required - I was called to become even more myself.

Even though I didn't understand it.
Even though I didn't know what the intense feelings of passion and emotion meant.
Even though I was indeed changing - it was to become closer to who I really am.

A shift towards my truest self.

With life changing you hear the alarm and receive the wake-up call.

With life confirming you see how it connects to who you already are.